Ahaha okay let's do Enter the Dragon
1: It depends on the circumstances. The street v training v competition. Ultimately, it's meeting the goal you set yourself in whatever circumstance you're in. So survival in a street fight, learning in training and victory according to the institutional rules in competition
2: It's not. Anger can provide motivation in the long term but motivation borne of sheer anger burns out quickly. Moreover, anger clouds the mind and prevents you assessing the situation and your options with an objective, practical mind, forcing you to act hastily with the intention of hurting the opponent. The intention should not be to hurt, but to protect yourself. This may come about by injuring the opponent but this decision should be taken coldly and objectively, not in the heat of anger.
3: Instantaneously. I can feel it the second my brain starts to assess things with emotion instead of logic and move to cut it out as quickly as possible.
4: Me, parents, girlfriend.
5: Three reasons: to keep myself safe and guarantee my personal security in a world where that cannot be taken for granted at any time, to improve myself as both a person and a martial artist and prove to myself that I am capable of defeating opposition.
Incidentally, what's your discipline?
1. Everything depends on the circumstances. What I meant to check was whether you are "ready to win" as per the purest philosophical sense of the word and you are, in a way. You appear to be the rare case who doesn't mind losing but you really can't accept it when it happens. Seems for many of that mindset that the fear of -not losing itself but- having to deal with not winning is a strong dive pushing them ahead. My wild guess is that you're that kind of guy. What I often like to tell people is that as long as you lose, you have what to learn. The moment it's wins you have to learn from, it's going to get a lot harder and a lot more confusing.
2. Anger is better than indifference because it means you still have the will to carry on. As soon as it's all the same to you, you'll lay down and die. Not you, though, because of what I guessed about you above. I could be wrong.
3. IF you say so, you might actually suppress it rather than really learn to channel it in a healthy way. Don't. It's better to find a healthy outlet.
4. So why do those faceless internet motherfuckers even matter?! XD Focus on people you care for and ignore people that don't matter. If you like to leave a mark in people because you're an evil bastard, then let nothing get a rise out of you but make them hate you as much as you can.
5. Yeah that's the sweet talk XD You like to win. I've got your number. Learn to love a good loss, it's very motivating if you learn how.
I was sixteen and never had so much vigor and so much real-life-driven rage in me. I got sat on my ass in a competition by a younger guy who was right at the lower edge of my weight category. Never been so salty. Online or offline. My teacher walked up to me and smacked my head. "You have one word to tell me now, what was the cause of you losing that fight? Think about it, don't rush it."
Ten years have passed and one morning I was in a hurry but my ride was late. I kept calling my ride to ask where the hell he was. Guy picks up the phone after the sixth try and is like, hold your horses I'm on the WA--" I heard him crash. If he hadn't been talking to me, he'd never have crashed.
I postponed my exam, didn't care. Sitting at the ER waiting for any news, I suddenly picked up my phone and dialed my teacher. He picked up. He hasn't seen me in four years, university was kicking my ass worse than any opponent at that point.
"Long time no see, kid. What's new?"
"Impatience."
"Better late than never." He responded, and we had a long talk. My friend recovered fine after they duct taped his ass back together.
Bottom line is this, we all have our shortcomings. Look inside you for the flaw that's causing you grief and if you can't find it, but only if you can't find it, should you try to look for it anywhere else.
EDIT: I started with kyo then moved on to judo, then to chinese things, and ended up with taijiquan by my "old age".
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