EntropicByDesign
It's all so very confusing.
Ill start out by saying I have no idea why I'm posting this. I've been sitting in front of the computer for about an hour and texting random friends and I just need to vent. What follows is ridiculous. I am 33yrs old, this shit does not happen to well-adjusted and functional adults.
This will be somewhat emo, and thoroughly absurd.
So.. My sister is a mess. Drugs. I have bent over backwards to help her. Like, so far backwards I've looped in on myself and ended up back where I started. Only with way less money and way more stress. I've almost lost my apartment more than once, because I had to spend my rent money on HER bills, so she didn't lose the house she lives in and my 10yr old niece ends up having to deal with that. I've listened to her lies and her bullshit. I've let her move in to my apartment without paying a dime THREE times, all three times she was here for 4-7 months, and the entire time she stole, shit talked me, started trouble. I caught her going through my GFs purse, she would wake up at like 6am (I live in a 600sq ft one bedroom apt) and then go in to a black RAGE when I would wake up a few hours later because she wanted time to herself.. I don't even know how to describe it. She's bipolar, except instead of swinging to manic happy, the furthest she goes is like passably not hateful, then she swings in to 'set you on fire for fun' nasty.. Its ridiculous. This has placed a HUGE strain on my relationship with my GF because I have tried to keep the peace and keep the situation on an even keel. I have sold things and pawned things of mine, then given my sister the money when I didn't even have enough gas to get to work the next day. I am not exaggerating, I have bled myself mostly dry for her. On top of all that about 5 mnonths ago I bought myself a cheap little car, I had it for two weeks, and let Jamie use it.. I got it back for the first time, TONIGHT.
Why the hell would I do all this? Why would anyone? Two reasons. One. My niece. Aubrey is awesome. My sister uses her as a weapon though. Don't play by her rules? Don't see Aubrey. Aubrey deserves better in life that she is getting. She cant have anything. I bought her a Wii, it was pawned. I bought her as laptop.. Pawned. Hell, I bought her a TEA SET BECAUSE SHE LIKES HOT TEA AND THAT GOT PAWNED. A 20$ tea set from Wal-Mart. The second reason? Giving my sister her way calms things down for about a day. When she doesn't get what she wants, she flips her shit. I'm talking threats, CONSTANT insults, 25-50 calls an HOUR with texts to match, just constant harassment. I'm a fucking pussy for being a grown man that gave in to my younger sisters bullshit bully tactics, but I just kept saying "Just do it and it'll blow over, if you just help her out she will shiut up and you can relax".. And it worked.. for 24hrs or less. This process would repeat itself, I AM NOT KIDDING, 3-6 days a week. Its not a once a month thing, or a once a week thing. It is EVERY SINGLE DAY.
Until tonight.
I wake up to texts from her, like every morning. Her latest scheme, I shit you not, is to get me to give plasma, and get paid for it, and give her atleast half the money. Now, I am DEAD broke. Like cant eat broke. Seriously, I am hungry and cannot eat. I got paid off a few months ago and al Ive found since has been part time work. Im working, and so is my GF, but we are JUST getting caught up from being behind where I got laid off. I am actively looking for a better job, but until one comes along, I'm working for peanuts trying to get at least full time hours where I am now, or find another disposable shit-job that is atleast full time. Anything I can do to make money. So, honestly, plasma center as shitty as it sounds, doesn't sound like a bad idea. We need the money and I have too many responsibilities to stand on some high horse and look down on doing what I have to do to get by, but give her half? Ehhhh no.
So, I go. Cant donate. Arrive too late. Didnt know they closed at 3, they arent accepting people past a certain point and I have missed that point. I go home. Well, i try. I am omw home and my GF's car breaks down. Probably the alternator. Ya know what? Things have been so shitty lately, I aint even upset. I just drop my head and push the car in to a church parking lot and start calling friends. Some people in the church see my broken down and come out to yell at me and tell me they will tow my car if I leave it there. i try to explain the situation and say I will have it gone by tomorrow at the latest if I CANT get it gone right away, but Im trying, could you please give me a little leeway just in-case. Nope. The head dude, dunno if he was a pastor or what, but the guy that seemed to be speaking for the group, pulls out his cellphone and calls the police. I had pushed the car in to the parking lot, so I just push it back out and on the side of the road. The cop shows, but Im off the property. He tells me he will have the city tow my car in a couple hours because its a busy road with no shoulder and Im in the way, etc. Luckily by this time a friend was on his way. We toe the car back to my apartment which thankfully was only a couple miles down the road.
to be continued when I getback. have to get GF from work.
This will be somewhat emo, and thoroughly absurd.
So.. My sister is a mess. Drugs. I have bent over backwards to help her. Like, so far backwards I've looped in on myself and ended up back where I started. Only with way less money and way more stress. I've almost lost my apartment more than once, because I had to spend my rent money on HER bills, so she didn't lose the house she lives in and my 10yr old niece ends up having to deal with that. I've listened to her lies and her bullshit. I've let her move in to my apartment without paying a dime THREE times, all three times she was here for 4-7 months, and the entire time she stole, shit talked me, started trouble. I caught her going through my GFs purse, she would wake up at like 6am (I live in a 600sq ft one bedroom apt) and then go in to a black RAGE when I would wake up a few hours later because she wanted time to herself.. I don't even know how to describe it. She's bipolar, except instead of swinging to manic happy, the furthest she goes is like passably not hateful, then she swings in to 'set you on fire for fun' nasty.. Its ridiculous. This has placed a HUGE strain on my relationship with my GF because I have tried to keep the peace and keep the situation on an even keel. I have sold things and pawned things of mine, then given my sister the money when I didn't even have enough gas to get to work the next day. I am not exaggerating, I have bled myself mostly dry for her. On top of all that about 5 mnonths ago I bought myself a cheap little car, I had it for two weeks, and let Jamie use it.. I got it back for the first time, TONIGHT.
Why the hell would I do all this? Why would anyone? Two reasons. One. My niece. Aubrey is awesome. My sister uses her as a weapon though. Don't play by her rules? Don't see Aubrey. Aubrey deserves better in life that she is getting. She cant have anything. I bought her a Wii, it was pawned. I bought her as laptop.. Pawned. Hell, I bought her a TEA SET BECAUSE SHE LIKES HOT TEA AND THAT GOT PAWNED. A 20$ tea set from Wal-Mart. The second reason? Giving my sister her way calms things down for about a day. When she doesn't get what she wants, she flips her shit. I'm talking threats, CONSTANT insults, 25-50 calls an HOUR with texts to match, just constant harassment. I'm a fucking pussy for being a grown man that gave in to my younger sisters bullshit bully tactics, but I just kept saying "Just do it and it'll blow over, if you just help her out she will shiut up and you can relax".. And it worked.. for 24hrs or less. This process would repeat itself, I AM NOT KIDDING, 3-6 days a week. Its not a once a month thing, or a once a week thing. It is EVERY SINGLE DAY.
Until tonight.
I wake up to texts from her, like every morning. Her latest scheme, I shit you not, is to get me to give plasma, and get paid for it, and give her atleast half the money. Now, I am DEAD broke. Like cant eat broke. Seriously, I am hungry and cannot eat. I got paid off a few months ago and al Ive found since has been part time work. Im working, and so is my GF, but we are JUST getting caught up from being behind where I got laid off. I am actively looking for a better job, but until one comes along, I'm working for peanuts trying to get at least full time hours where I am now, or find another disposable shit-job that is atleast full time. Anything I can do to make money. So, honestly, plasma center as shitty as it sounds, doesn't sound like a bad idea. We need the money and I have too many responsibilities to stand on some high horse and look down on doing what I have to do to get by, but give her half? Ehhhh no.
So, I go. Cant donate. Arrive too late. Didnt know they closed at 3, they arent accepting people past a certain point and I have missed that point. I go home. Well, i try. I am omw home and my GF's car breaks down. Probably the alternator. Ya know what? Things have been so shitty lately, I aint even upset. I just drop my head and push the car in to a church parking lot and start calling friends. Some people in the church see my broken down and come out to yell at me and tell me they will tow my car if I leave it there. i try to explain the situation and say I will have it gone by tomorrow at the latest if I CANT get it gone right away, but Im trying, could you please give me a little leeway just in-case. Nope. The head dude, dunno if he was a pastor or what, but the guy that seemed to be speaking for the group, pulls out his cellphone and calls the police. I had pushed the car in to the parking lot, so I just push it back out and on the side of the road. The cop shows, but Im off the property. He tells me he will have the city tow my car in a couple hours because its a busy road with no shoulder and Im in the way, etc. Luckily by this time a friend was on his way. We toe the car back to my apartment which thankfully was only a couple miles down the road.
to be continued when I getback. have to get GF from work.